There are moments when I wonder if He is listening, if He is working, or if I'm doing what I should be doing. College was one of those "moments." There would be days when I'd sit and cry and wonder is God trying to tell me something and I'm just not hearing Him? Is He even telling me anything at all? I recently told a friend that there have been a lot of times in my life when I don't feel anything between myself and God. There have been times when others have told me that they feel God telling them something about my future, and because I don't feel anything like that (and because they are people I trust) I listen to them.
My problem is that I want tangible proof in that moment (almost like a bolt of lightning) that God is working, but that's not how He works. He does what He knows is best for us in the timing that He knows is best. I see that now.
Last night I looked up at the sky and realized how small I was, but amazingly enough, God STILL loves me and cares for me! I'm a speck on a speck, but God is incredibly faithful.
I looked up, and suddenly, I saw Him. I saw His work in my life. I saw how each little event that I had deemed meaningless, He used for something so big and oh so good. He used each moment of doubt and each decision made in uncertainty and each tear and each change-up to do a great work. I felt my heart fill with the truth that is God's plan. It is so beyond our comprehension, but God, in his grace, gives us little glimpses of how wonderful and magnificent He truly is to those that He loves, and we are oh so blessed.
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